This week’s entry was written by Katie.
After last week’s debacle; we approached this week with childlike innocence. We decided to take a look at the newest trend of live action Disney remakes. We saw The Jungle Book earlier this year and we were suitably impressed, so our picks for today were Pete’s Dragon (2016) and Beauty and the Beast (2017).
As a reminder, this blog is not spoiler free, so if you’re still waiting to watch these movies, turn back now, here there be dragons.
Pete’s Dragon
Pete’s Dragon is a CGI remake of the animation/live action 1977 classic about a small boy who befriends a dragon as he escapes from his abusive foster family. My dad suggested this movie because the orig came out when he was a freshman in high school. Being the cool guy he was, he couldn’t possibly ask his friends to go with him, lest he suffer some sick burns, nor could he ask his mom to take him (for the same reason…) Tragically, that young man never got to see it in theaters, but by God the adult got to see the remake in his living room.
First things first, let’s talk about movie tropes that should die suddenly and without warning: Mothers looking into the backseat just prior to a deadly car crash. We get it. Car crashes are scary and can happen unexpectedly, but, like, can we please come up with a different way to kill off pesky parents to advance your tired plot? Also, everyone who has taken drivers ed courses knows that if a deer runs into the road: you hit the fucking deer*. If you didn’t already know this, you’re welcome.
Okay, back to the movie, it starts out with the above mentioned sudden orphaning of (spoiler alert) Pete, by way of the aforementioned overwrought trope. He wanders off into the woods, pursued by wolves, saved and befriended by (spoiler alert) a furry fucking dragon. This really bothered us. Dragons are reptilian. They have scales. This was a clear cash grab by the Disney Toy Industrial Complex™️ for their inevitable plush movie tie in.
We then smash cut to 6 years later when Pete is running footloose and fancy free through the woods with his dragon (named Elliot because children are bad at naming things), seemingly at one with nature, but WHAT WAS THAT? Loggers (Karl Urban and Wes Bentley) and a plucky forest ranger (Bryce Dallas Howard) traipsing through the woods like they own the place. Pete is quickly discovered by the humans and torn away from the only caregiver he’s ever known.
Long story short, Pete and his dragon spend the whole movie trying to get back to one another, thwarted by the machinations of a greedy logger (Urban), different than the Good Logger (Bentley) who cares about the forest and sustainability. Oh, and Robert Redford is also in this for some reason.
If you couldn’t already tell by my acerbic tone, we didn’t actually enjoy this movie, despite a strong critical reception. It was boring, so much so in fact, we paused it for half an hour to wax philosophical about current events. The plot was predictable, the CGI was weak in some parts, the cast was of excellent pedigree, but hamstrung by an anemic script. It didn’t even mirror the plot of the original. Where was the Disney magic? We miss it. We’re calling this one at 2 flipped station wagons out of 5 (🚗🚗)
Beauty and the Beast
I’m calling this section Disney Magic 2: The Return of the Magic. Beauty and the Beast was inevitably my pick because I forced my parents to watch this movie over and over and over again as a child (they said I wore out something called a VHS tape?).
After Pete’s Dragon, I wasn’t ready to love again, but this film warmed the very cockles of my heart. This movie fulfilled every requirement I have for remakes: plot consistency, star studded cast used to their full potential (who knew Hermione could sing?!), and cinematic excellence. We’re not going to give a run down of the plot on this one because if you’ve seen the 1991 joint, you know what’s up, unlike Pete’s Dragon, which was a complete departure.
As someone who has seen the animated classic hundreds of times, I know the plot and the songs by heart. This movie not only stayed true to the original, but brought some new Menken/Rice/Ashman numbers to film in a way that was fresh and honored their original book of music. The slight changes they made to the plot surprised us by being refreshing and strengthened the narrative.
Gaston as a character seemed much less foolish and much more malevolent. The Beast, while flawed, much more human. The aforementioned uncanny valley was unsettling, specifically with Lumiere, but not altogether to the detriment of the film. We were able to bridge the valley without incident. We held highly spirited singalongs during the musical numbers.
In short, this movie was an absolute delight. 5 Gastons out of 5 (💪💪💪💪💪)
*Personal note: I hit the deer and survived (along with my best friends, one of whom was able to attend her own wedding the next day)… No orphans on my watch…. Too bad for my friend’s car 🚗😢.
Movies With My Dad 